ROSY RENES

Look here in the mirror A girl, long gone forgotten With lips that quiver and a heart that shivers Alone pondering, wondering Is it, love or is it loathe? The answer lies somewhere in the depths of her own reflection Buried underneath the scars,  and ghosts of the past.

Yes, I've been away in 2015. It was a year full of trials, experiments, loss and self-discovery. I was preparing for my volunteer exchange abroad with AIESEC. I flunked in 2 subjects, was dealing with my grandfather's death, I was a mess. I found myself slowly drifting away, lost.  Eventually, on the summer holiday, I went for my exchange to Thailand, to teach English to children in the rural areas for 6 weeks. I hadn't the slightest idea of seeing myself to be a teacher. Yes, sometimes I taught my friends if they needed help, but it wasn't teaching , it's more like tutoring. I prayed so that I can be a good teacher, who's not only teaching English correctly, but also educating the children to do the right thing, to be a good human. The project was very important to me, it matters that I have to be a good teacher, and not to waste any of my time there. But I didn't know, that what I did, would mean so much for the children there.   I was placed in Si...

There I was, pondering about why people were so weird, one gloomy, rainy afternoon. But then, what I didn't know was when I looked up to the sky, and there it was. Surprise! My first rainbow in 2015. [  Pardon the net ] [ Beyond the net ] [ The end of the rainbow ] Pictures taken by me Bandung, 06-01-2015 05.55 p.m.

The lamplights near my home, replacing the stars. Pretty, but at the same time it's sad, because the light pollution disturbs the stars observation.  And I thought,  " So the lamp-lighter got many lamps to light and to put out now, and the photo-hunters got a new object, and the star-gazers are disappointed, because the stars are missing. " [ Lamplights ] [ Tilt-shift ] [ Bokeh + tilt-shift ] P.s. These photos were taken about a week ago, when I came home. Bandung, West Java, Indonesia.

Happy Lebaran 1435 H everyone!   Please forgive me if I ever make mistakes to you. Minal aidzin wal faidzin, mohon maaf lahir dan batin :)  

Suddenly I feel the urge to write this post. Many things will change after this Eid-ul Fitr ( Lebaran in Indonesia), I will go to college and stay in the dorm for a year, after that I have to find a place to live near my campus. I get back in touch again with my cousins, after several years I didn't hear anything from them. Also, I got new friends, from all over Indonesia. And I guess my life will be moving faster, in a fast-forward mode.  Oh, alhamdulillah now I'm officially a Telkom University (Tel-U) student, majoring in Informatics Engineering in Telkom Engineering School! I'm quite happy, though I didn't pass SBMPTN, but I'm happy I'm in Telkom because I already know some people there, and already made new friends even before the new term started! I knew them via twitter, from the #MABA2014 @InfoUnivTelkom, they were looking for students with the same major as me, and I said hi.  At first I was afraid, what if they didn't like me? What if th...

This morning I was curious about the Aptitude Test because my friend tried it, so I opened the web and take the test, and I am divergent. [ The result ]

" When you see a person from their heart, I think their looks don't matter anymore. "

Why do I type "miseries" instead of just "misery" ? Because it's many. It's torturing when you want to get a part-time job, but most of the vacancies available requires you to be a college kid in their 2nd year. Damn.  Well yeah, soon to enter college, I'm still waiting for the result announcement though, which is an added misery. I reaally need a part-time job because I have to make some money to fix my analogue camera. It was my mother's, and then she said I could have it. Another problem, a part-time job for a highschool fresh graduates like me isn't easy to find in Indonesia. You can say it's quite an uncommon thing in here for students to have a part-time job. Last, because I don't have many things to do, that's why I need some activity to fill my spare time.

Selamat menunaikan ibadah puasa 1435 H! Minal aidzin wal faidzin, semoga puasa kita diberi kelancaran dan kita diberi berkah yang berlimpah di bulan ini. Happy fasting guys! :)

This below is my testimony for Kumon Class Diary as a Completer. Hola! Saya Renes, panjangnya Rana Renes Rengga. Saya mulai ikut Kumon Math saat kelas 1 SD. Pada awalnya, Ibu saya tidak mengijinkan saya untuk ikut Kumon, tetapi, karena saya ngotot, akhirnya Ibu saya mengijinkan saya untuk ikut, dengan perjanjian bahwa saya harus menyelesaikan Kumon saya sampai akhir, karena kata Ibu, jika saya hanya ikut setengah jalan, apa yang sudah saya usahakan akan sia-sia. Saya setuju. Dan setelah itu, saya berusaha untuk menyelesaikan Kumon Math, meskipun saya membutuhkan waktu 12 tahun. Tapi saya senang karena berhasil menyelesaikannya.  Manfaatnya memang belum begitu terasa saat saya SD, tapi baru terasa ketika masuk SMA, dan untuk persiapan masuk kuliah. Sebelum ikut Kumon, konsentrasi saya gampang pecah. Ada suara sedikit, meleng. Ada orang lewat, meleng lagi. Tapi setelah ikut Kumon, sedikit-sedikit konsentrasi saya meningkat, sampai saya tidak kesulitan berkonsentrasi lag...

Apa itu bahagia? Orang bilang, bahagia itu sederhana. Simpel. Kalau dari artikata.com, definisi bahagia adalah 1. keadaan atau perasaan senang dan tenteram (bebas dari segala yang menyusahkan) 2. beruntung. Kalau menurut aku, bahagia itu bebas. Bahagia itu juga berarti mensyukuri dan menerima. Bebas dari rasa takut, sesal, dan gelisah. Jadi benar apa yang dibilang sama artikata.com, bahagia itu merasa tentreram. Tapi aku juga mau nambahin, bukan cuma tenteram, tapi juga tenang dan damai. Mensyukuri dan menerima. Kalau kita bisa bersyukur atas apa yang sudah kita terima, apa yang sudah kita dapatkan, well, bukan cuma bahagia yang kita dapat, tapi, kita bisa berpikir bahwa hidup ini indah, dan terus, menikmati hidup. It's been some time since the last time I could feel such definition of happiness. I wonder when will I ever feel that way again. And when I wrote "such definition of happiness" I really mean real happiness . Bukan bahagia yang semu, rasa senang yang....

It's been a while. Setelah sibuk ngurusin belajar buat SBMPTN tiap hari, sekarang semuanya udah beres. Alhamdulillah. Sekarang semuanya sudah selesai, tinggal nunggu pengumuman nanti tanggal 17 Juli. Mudah-mudahan bisa lolos, aaamiin, doain ya!

Saturday, 24th May 2014. Present from Sheila, which is a new agenda :) To: Sheila Subject: Thank you soo much Sheil! 

Yesterday I visit Grandpa at my Aunt's house, and he gave me a chemistry crash course, also some of his old stuff. Katanya kalau pakai yang Dow (the white one), harus ditaksir berapa kira-kira angka yang ada di antara skalanya. Dan ada 2% tingkat kesalahan dalam penaksiran itu. Kalau yang contoller, bilangannya cenderung bulat. But still, he said it's better to use nowadays calculator, because it doesn't have the 2% mistake rate. [Jaqcuard paper bundle | The Dow Ruler, Calculator, and Table | Calculator-Controller from Amtraco] [ My favorite, Grandpa said this can be used to calculate in knot]

I think, the best thing about being a writer, is that you are free to become whoever you like in your story. Anybody you want to be in real life, but you can't. You have the freedom to transform people, to say what you can't say to them in reality. Most of all, you're free to be yourself.

Several days ago, I attend this Bandung Global Youth Conference 4.0, held by AIESEC LC Bandung, which is my first conference. It was 3 days, from April 25-27. The theme is how to be a 21st century leaders. I was the only highschooler in BGYC, the rest were college kids. At first I was worried, because I hardly knew anyone. But my worries were wrong, I get to know and meet new people, learn new ideas, and have some new friends. In BGYC, I learn that age doesn't matter. If you could make a change, then make it happen!   

[When we're babies] [As kids] [Now, teens]

Yes, I'm going to complain in this post. Tentang buku paket PKn. 1. Kenapa sih buku paket Pkn itu bahasanya pada ribet-ribet? Gak to the point aja gitu? Pusing tau bacanya, ngerti juga nggak. Ini nih salah satu faktor penyebab nilai kewarganegaraan merosot, jangan heran negerinya carut-marut macam sekarang. 2. Ngejelasinnya juga jangan muter-muter, yang ngurut. Karena di buku paket pinjaman dari sekolah, materinya gak berurutan, dan bercabang kemana-mana. 3. Batasan antar subbab rancu, kabur. 4. Penjelasannya ga perlu dikaji dari pemahaman metafisika kan? Pake penjelasan yang dikaji dari pemahaman yang simple dan logis aja deh. Ini gara-garanya dikasih THR Pkn disuruh ngerangkum, rangkum bab 1, banyak. Pas dibaca, itu penjelasannya rumit, muter-muter ga jelas.

Selamat ulang tahun Indonesia! Yang ke-68. Tadi aku sama Ibu baru aja pasang bendera di depan rumah. Mudah-mudahan di umur yang ke-68 ini korupsi tamat, rakyatnya lebih mudah diatur, pemerintahannya ga busuk-egois-cuekbebek, dan yang paling penting, bisa mengatasi permasalahan negerinya. Jadi tidak menyia-nyiakan perjuangan para pahlawan. Merdeka!