Over the Years: Mes Journaux

As promised, finally I can introduce my old comrades to you! These past weeks had been hectic because I was busy preparing for my graduation day. Looking for a place to stay, making accessories for my "kebaya", make-up trials with my cousin, buying contact lens and practicing to put them on, yada, yada, etc. Putting contacts is A LOT of effort, I'm telling you. It took me several tries to be able to put them onto both of my eyes in under 15 minutes. Afterwards, I was overly exhausted from going out so much under the cold & rainy weather, which resulted in me catching a cold (still am).

[ My journals over the years ]

This agenda/journal thingy actually started back in elementary. My school was a private one, they provide each student with an agenda and all students are obligated to write each homework given in the book, after we finished writing it, our homeroom teacher would sign it. When we got home, we have to show the agenda to our parents and they were required to sign it as well. The next day, our homeroom teacher would check if the agenda had any parent's signature on it, as a way of making sure that our parents know about our homework. Pretty organized, huh? You could get into trouble if your agenda didn't have any parent signature for 3 consecutive days. My mom encouraged me to keep that habit when I went to a public school for junior & senior high. So, meet my old comrades since then.

Junior High

[ 2008 ]

I remember that this mustard yellow agenda is the first agenda I have ever bought. It's lined and has date on every page, for 365 days. Aside from school related stuff, I didn't write much in this agenda. Maybe because life wasn't as hard as it is nowadays (haha). But, this yellow book had become a benchmark to me, especially when choosing an agenda or a journal.

[ 2009 - 2010 ]

These books are my favorite notebooks, I used to love them too much that I never really used it, until I needed a new agenda. Since they are ordinary, lined school notebooks, I had to manually date them every month. Of course, there were times when I made mistakes with the dates and days. It was a hassle, but I always find it rather relaxing.

High School 

[ 2011 - 2012 ]

Fun fact: this is actually a bonus from a magazine. I was in the 10th grade. There is this girls magazine called "GADIS", I literally begged my mom to buy that specific issue just to get this agenda as a bonus. Hey, it was cool at its time, okay? I got a lot of compliments on this one because it's very cute. The pages were full colored, with lots and lots of extras in it. Also, I began to add small notes consisting of events or stuff that happened in that day.

[ 2012 - 2013 ]

Ah, 11th grade. One of my favorite agendas, the paper is a recycled paper, a bit yellow-ish, very nice quality, very smooth and thick. The pages are lined, but not dated, so I also had to write the dates manually. I usually added stories of the day's events under the school's section. The blue sticker in front was bought when I competed in a science competition. It's safe to say, this one's filled with good, warm memories of me and my high school friends.

[ 2013 - 2014 ]

Honestly, I DID NOT LIKE the book, at all. But I was very desperate, because I have searched and searched all over the bookstore for an agenda that suits me, but I had found none. So, I settled for this brown-red agenda that I get in a stationary shop in my childhood neighborhood. The paper is white, almost grayish, quite thin and not dated. My senior year was filled with problems and drama. Now when I read the book, I wonder how I managed to survive all of those things in one piece. Like seriously, on the day of my Physics senior finals, I was LATE for 1 HOUR. Of course, I couldn't think properly. I was fortunate enough that the teachers even let me do my exam.

University

[ 2014 ]

18 April 2014 - the day when I bought it - was written on the first page. After paying a visit to my now late grandfather, we stopped by Giant Pasteur. Didn't remember why, maybe we were hungry or we just wanted to stop by, ended up getting this book (also because I needed a new agenda and had found none that suited my needs). I had finished the national exam, was waiting for my graduation and was preparing for university entrance exam. I had been accepted into a private uni (which has become my alma mater now), but I still wanted to give it a try for the public ones one. So I wouldn't have any what ifs or whatever regret. The blue book is quite plain, it has white pages, normal thickness, lined and not dated. I started journaling in this book, not caring to write on my small PowerPuff Girls diary anymore.

[ 2015 ]

The transition from 2014 to 2015 is kinda a... weird time for me? As a freshman, I was too excited that I took so much more than I could handle. And, THIS TINY BOOK, is my lifesaver, my best comrade, an all time favorite. 2015 was most definitely an eventful year. I got a D in Algorithm & Programming, become a committee for more than 3 different events, a member of several organizations, a tutor, taught in Thailand (read here), etc. I had also lost my grandfather. This slim, small book, is the one that helped me go through it all, and even though filled with bittersweet memories, when I looked at it, I always felt happy. I don't understand why.

[ 2016 ]

My very first handmade journal! At this point, I had given up looking for the perfect journal, since none suited me. So, I decided to make one for myself. It's softcover, not stitched, A5 size, with hand-painted monthly divider. The cover pattern is by ... (sorry, I forgot) but I didn't make the pattern, I swear to God, and I only used the pattern for personal use. However, I did the cover design, using PowerPoint (hehe). I used plain green and yellow colored paper for the text block, quite thick and the book approximately has 200/300 pages. I got a lot of compliments for the hand-painted dividers. Well, I really took my time in planning the 12 pieces of A5 sized paper.

[ 2017 ]

From 2017 I started to implement bullet journal method. It somehow suits me. The cover's pattern was inspired from my Mom's songket pattern, and I added some twists to my own design above. I used the stencil method: first I draw my design on the sketch book, second I cut out the pattern. Creating a cut out for this pattern was a slow torture, because during the process, I was hating myself for making a small, intricate pattern. Third, I taped the stencil to the cover so it wouldn't budge. Last, I brush-painted them with a mixture of acrylic and poster paint, let them dry and spray them with clear coating. For the cover materials, I used white PVC glue, thick blue cardboard paper and duplex cardboard paper for the inside, to make the book more sturdy. The mistake I made was in the spine, it was far too wide so the book couldn't lay flat which then caused the front outer hinge to tear apart. 2017 was one hell of a year.

[ 2018 ]

Last, but not least, my current journal! Colored paper is used for the text block, only the paper is not really thick. I still use duplex cardboard for the cover, to make it sturdy, but instead of cardboard paper, I use calendar paper to wrapped it and use a colored plastic sheet as the final wrap. The initial plan is to create marble texture by benefiting from the plastic and liquid paint. By using a wooden BBQ stick, I dipped it in white poster paint and roll it with my fingers on the book cover. After it dried, I dissolve a gold acrylic paint in water and drip it on top of the white poster paint. Bad move, I know, since it could dissolve the dried poster paint. I didn't realize that until some of the white paint began to smudge while waiting for the gold drips to dry. Those drips took a long, long time to dry. So, I tried to blot the excess water with tissue paper. Learning from my 2017 book, I managed to make the spine in the right size, so the book can actually lay flat! Hurrah! This journal holds a lot of secrets. I think the older you get, the more secrets you have.

All and all, those are my comrades that stand by me through thick and thin. I'm sorry that this post took longer time than expected. Initially, I only wanted to show you my journal/agenda evolution, but old memories also resurface when I'm writing this and I need some time to compose my emotions. Let me know what you think!